Uncategories Random Thoughts & Future Plans

Random Thoughts & Future Plans

Published on 10:21 AM By Aunica
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Decision making.
Not. A. Fan.
As I've been delving into the  depths of my soul these past couple weeks, I think I know where this particular phobia comes from. Growing up I was told I was manipulative, so as a kid I believed that was true. Thus, I've always thought that if I cared either way, I'd somehow subconsciously manipulate people into doing what i wanted. So I've reached the point in my life where I actually don't know what I like to do, who I am, and I can never make decisions.
So great, right?
So if anyone knows of a life-decider that could follow me around, give me the statistics as far as the outcome of situations go, and tell me what to do in every possible situation, I'd be much obliged.

The current decision crisis is this:
What do I do with my life?
Do I want to be a house wife because that's what the US has told me?
Do I want to live in the US?
Do I want to major in intercultural studies or design?
What do I even like to do?
After a month out of an art class I've realized that I actually really miss it.
I love walking around the MIA, and i really just like art in general.
I think it was something I had to realize on my own, though. Not because people have told me I'm good at it, but because I actually want to do it.
So at this moment I'll be a design student at NWC in the fall.
Transferring there is non-negotiable. I really like it there, a lot.
So I'm excited!
Who knows what I'll do with design - illustrate? Design? Who knows?
But something I realized yesterday was that just because I'm a design major doesn't mean I have to stay in the office. I can do design anywhere I please. I could sit at a park and work. That'd be great! Or at a coffee shop!
And a few things God has definitely layed on my heart are: Lukewarm Christians (easier found in the USA than abroad), girls who are going through similar things that I've gone through (mentoring - also easier in the USA), and the crisis that is our middle age complacency (if I live in the US, instead of running away from my fear, God can use it).
In the long run, I don't have to major in missions to do that if I decide to do it later on. So I think I'll do design. And possibly stay in the US. And find a job that in the early years lets me travel a lot.
Then, I could also lead a bible study or be reaching out to other women. A new generation of house wives - those who love the Lord and desire to grow our children with the same desire to serve Him.
Perfect.
So there we have it.
Aunica has made a decision.
Aunica

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