Archive for September 2013

Why I No Longer Write Letters to my Future Husband

Published on 7:15 AM By Aunica
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If you've grown up in the church, it's more than likely you've gone to one of those weekend long women's retreats, heard a beauty/dating seminar, or had a girl talk in youth group or bible study. And, if that is true, you've probably met the plethora of women who write letters loyally to their future husband.

I used to be one of those women. I remember tear filled nights of loneliness, bitterly scrawling on some notebook paper. Some notes were filled with earnest love and prayer for his life as he surely encounters all of the dangers and heartache that come with our time on earth. Others were filled with telling him about my life at the time, trying to prove that I'm cool or funny or popular. Some were filled with questions - what's taking you so long? Where are you? Haven't I waited long enough? But, those seldom made it in the box that I'd give him someday.

Lately, God's been changing my heart towards these things I used to think were required of christian women. "Waiting." The letter writing. Etc.
I'm not 'waiting' for my future husband. I'm not sitting around wasting my life until he gets here. And while I learned that a few months ago (http://aunicabuseman.blogspot.com/2013/05/im-not-waiting-for-my-future-husband.html) , and continue to learn that day by day, my Abba continues to reveal to me other ways that indicate that I'm not living my life in the moment.

By writing letters, it caused me to focus not on the day by day, but on the future. Longing for married days. Longing to meet my best friend. Longing to be cared for. Cherished. Loved. Writing letters to my future husband, while it's a nice idea, has caused me to struggle to focus on what God's doing now. Writing letters has caused me to be discontent with the blessings Yahweh is giving me now.


Instead of pursuing the idea of a husband, pursue your relationship with Christ. Channel that energy and time into your time with your sweet Jesus. Seek Christ. Above all else. Write letters to your Abba. Spend time pouring your heart out to Yahweh. Find rest in His presence.

So, I challenge you. While writing letters to your future husband is in no way an inherently bad thing, is it causing you to be discontent? Is it causing you to be distracted? Are you fully able to be grateful for the sweet blessings Abba is giving you in the now? Are you able to live your life in the moment?

{{This all being said, I do not in any way, shape, or form think that writing to your future husband is inherently bad. I am not telling you to stop if it isn't distracting. I am simply challenging you to examine your motives and make sure it isn't causing your heart to become discontent in the presence of our sweet Jesus.}}

{This blog post is in no way meant to offend. I'd love to talk about it if you have any questions.}

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