Jonah
1:1-2 The word of the Lord came to Jonah son of Amittai: “Go to the great city of Nineveh and preach against it, because its wickedness has come up before me.”
When I was 10, I went to a mission conference at my church, and for the first time my eyes were opened to God's heart for His people. I longed for the week of hearing each missionary tell God's story and work in their country, and my heart stirred deeply as Abba whispered "Aunica, Aunica, my daughter, go. Go and preach the gospel. Go and share my love with my people."
1:3 But Jonah ran away from the Lord and headed for Tarshish. He went down to Joppa,where he found a ship bound for that port. After paying the fare, he went aboard and sailed for Tarshish to flee from the Lord.
However, as I got older, and that whisper seemed to fade in the midst of the busyness of life, and I began to question the calling I had further clung to with such fervor. So, I decided to do something that was safe. I decided to do design. I mean, I liked it, and I'd make money and be comfortable, and who knows? I could always go on mission trips. No problem.
1:4-5 Then the Lord sent a great wind on the sea, and such a violent storm arose that the ship threatened to break up. All the sailors were afraid and each cried out to his own god. And they threw the cargo into the sea to lighten the ship.
When I got to college, my ship began to rock. The things I had previously found my identity in were stripped away, until I was left with nothing but the Rock to cling to.
1:6 But Jonah had gone below deck, where he lay down and fell into a deep sleep. The captain went to him and said, “How can you sleep? Get up and call on your god! Maybe he will take notice of us so that we will not perish.”
But, being stubborn as I am, instead of listening to what God was trying to tell me, I hardened my heart to the idea of missions and continued to pursue the comfort I so craved.
1:7-10 Then the sailors said to each other, “Come, let us cast lots to find out who is responsible for this calamity.” They cast lots and the lot fell on Jonah. So they asked him, “Tell us, who is responsible for making all this trouble for us? What kind of work do you do? Where do you come from? What is your country? From what people are you?”
He answered, “I am a Hebrew and I worship the Lord, the God of heaven, who made the sea and the dry land.”
This terrified them and they asked, “What have you done?” (They knew he was running away from the Lord, because he had already told them so.)
Freshman year I took a class called Perspectives in World Missions. It's funny looking back, because I completely wasted my time. I wasn't open to learning, mostly attributed to the deep fear that was rooted in the possibility that God would then call me to do missions, and my heart was REALLY hard to what was being taught. I remember at the end of the class they asked us which role we thought we'd play in missions and I was adamant that I'd just be supporting missions, not actually partaking.
1:11-16 The sea was getting rougher and rougher. So they asked him, “What should we do to you to make the sea calm down for us?”
“Pick me up and throw me into the sea,” he replied, “and it will become calm. I know that it is my fault that this great storm has come upon you.”
Instead, the men did their best to row back to land. But they could not, for the sea grew even wilder than before. Then they cried out to the Lord, “Please, Lord, do not let us die for taking this man’s life. Do not hold us accountable for killing an innocent man, for you,Lord, have done as you pleased.” Then they took Jonah and threw him overboard, and the raging sea grew calm. At this the men greatly feared the Lord, and they offered a sacrifice to the Lord and made vows to him.
Things continued to be hard. Junior year of college was personally the hardest season I've had in my life so far, but I continued to pursue the career I was convinced would give me the comfort and peace I so desired.1:17 Now the Lord provided a huge fish to swallow Jonah, and Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights.
Then I got eaten by a reeeeally big fish.
Okay, not really. But in a sense. I hit rock bottom. I cried on my large, fluffy rug for a whole semester and thought my world was crashing down around me. So, in a sense, I guess you could say I got swallowed. And MAN was it dark in there.
2:1-9 Then Jonah prayed to the LORD his God from the belly of the fish, saying,
“I called out to the LORD, out of my distress, and he answered me; out of the belly of Sheol I cried, and you heard my voice. For you cast me into the deep, into the heart of the seas, and the flood surrounded me; all your waves and your billows passed over me. Then I said, ‘I am driven away from your sight; yet I shall again look upon your holy temple.’ The waters closed in over me to take my life; the deep surrounded me; weeds were wrapped about my head at the roots of the mountains. I went down to the land whose bars closed upon me forever; yet you brought up my life from the pit, O LORD my God. When my life was fainting away, I remembered the LORD, and my prayer came to you, into your holy temple. Those who pay regard to vain idols forsake their hope of steadfast love. But I with the voice of thanksgiving will sacrifice to you; what I have vowed I will pay. Salvation belongs to the LORD!”
So, I prayed. In my distress. In the depths of the "belly of the fish" I cried out for salvation and rest from my heavenly Father. And he listened. And I remembered his whispering.
2:10 And the Lord commanded the fish, and it vomited Jonah onto dry land.
And, one day, I woke up. And I was fine. I didn't cry anymore, and my heart felt like it was slowly beginning to patch itself up again. I was on dry land once more.
3:1-2 Then the word of the Lord came to Jonah a second time: “Go to the great city of Nineveh and proclaim to it the message I give you.”
And, another long God story later (see my blogpost on internships & waffle fries), I'm here working for a missions organization - leading mission trips in the Dominican Republic. That whisper from my childhood was no joke. God doesn't take His heart for His people lightly.
3:3a Jonah obeyed the word of the Lord and went to Nineveh.
And so, I'm obeying. And that's where my Jonah story stops, for now. To be continued as I prepare to leave for the Dominican Republic in less than two weeks and see what the rest of this crazy journey looks like.
"I lean not on my own understanding - my life is in the hands of the maker of Heaven"
